OCONUS (overseas) PCS move & fear of flying - How can I get out of this move?

My husband has orders to move the whole family overseas, but I am scared to death to fly. (He is the service member, I am the wife.) How do I get a medical certificate that says I have a bona fide fear of flying? There has got to be a way the Army can put me on some kind of ship. I am having serious anxiety issues concerning this upcoming PCS move, and if I have to get on a place, I believe I will have a nervous breakdown. Help! Can I get a medical certificate to get me out of flying? How? Will the Army pay for a cruise instead of a flight, or do they have some kind of ship I can get on? Is there a way to get out of the PCS move altogether & stay stateside? Thanks for the info!

Public Comments

1. I'm not sure. Who's doing the flying? Commercial or the Boys in Blue? If it's our boys then you have nothing to fear. I know that want help you any but I just had to say it. I'd get something from the Doc to where you were passed out the whole flight but that's just me. I love to fly so I am biased I guess.
2. When I was active duty I had an extreme fear of flying like yourself. They gave me a drug to knock me out. I slept from CA all the way to Korea. You should go see your doctor who may be able to help you out. Your husband can try to get his orders changed, he needs to talk to his chain of command. Don't think the military will pay for a ship to take you. Good luck.
3. You could: stay stateside while hubby pcs's take a ship, the government will pay if it's cheaper than flying, if more you'll pay the difference between the air fare and the ship *Confront your fears would be the best choice, see a counselor to help you overcome, I hate flying too, but it's something in this society you must do from time to time
4. Talk to The Doc about giving you some medication for the plane trip! Trust me it helps. Do not pass up the oppurtunity to visit and explore another country plus you get COLA while overseas and that is some good money!!!
5. You have three choices:1) Fly heavily medicated, 2) take a ship and pay for it out of pocket, about $2500.00, or 3) stay stateside.
6. If your husband is new to the military (still in AIT) have him try to trade assignments. If he's been in for awhile have him contact his branch manager. The branch manager is the guy who decides where everyone goes. He might be able to get some results that way. I don't see a doctor's note for a spouse swaying the big Army, sadly. Anti-anxiety medicine might be a good last resort, though.
7. Go to the doctor tell them you have anxiety issues and they'll give you pills. They'll knock you out and flying won't be an issue for you.
8. You can stay CONUS all you want, but your husband is going.
9. I'm sorry that this isn't a more positive experience for you...this should be such an exciting time. Did you know people aren't really afraid of flying! They are claustrophobic. I'm guessing that you don't like any small spaces at all? I can't sit in the back of a two door car for the same reason. You should be able to see a counselor at Life Skills/Mental health/whatever name it is this week for free. If the counselor doesn't work out, you can take the boat. You will have to pay for part of it out of pocket because it is cheaper for the military to fly you there, but you can still take the boat. Good luck...I hope it works out for you and your family.
10. Come on people. This is a discussion you guys should have had before he took these orders. No he cannot get out of the orders over a phobia. No they are not going to send you on a cruise ship either. Ships sink, don't you fear that? These are things that should have been medically documented by a real doctor in your medical record a long time ago. Something if in fact real that you should have been receiving treatment for. The Army is not now going to jump all over the place for a phobia and a desire to ditch the orders. You would need to be proven to be an exceptional family member which in my opinion should only be for people with true disabilities: MS, cancer, Down's Syndrome......real problems. How about being happy that you are alive and well enought to fly if you choose to or are asked to keep your family together so your husband can serve his country and support you in the process. Reality check seriously. You can stay home, but you are going to get the pay to support two households. Not to be totally nasty, but I have seen so much honest and real life hurt and real agony with people that your phobia of flying makes me really question society. Look at how many Soldiers, Marines, Sailors and Airmen have given their lives, limbs and minds and you are wigging out over flying which is 100% safer than driving your car...........get yourself together here and gets some real help and cope with this in a real manner.
11. no, the military will NOT pay for a cruise. they will only pay to fly you. if you choose to not go, your forfeit a lot for one, you will not qualify for Family Sep unless he is deployed and you would have gotten it anyway, you would NOT be allowed to stay in base housing stateside. and he would STILL have to complete the entire term..all three years if not more.
12. I find your question fascinating and humorous because I was that wife just like you. Had extreme anxiety about flying. It is important for your husband and for keeping your family intact that you do something positive now. See a Psychiatrist at the base hospital. Tell them how much anxiety you have and get some counseling too because you have many flights ahead of you and many fun experiences too. I flew with a 10 month old, from Pittsburgh, Pa. to Seoul, Korea in 1974. Seventeen hours on a plane. Flew to Germany with just the children ages 3,4,6, in 1979, and that flight was 7-9 hours. I wasn't taking anti-anxiety meds then. Didn't want to fly either trip but missed my husband so much, just couldn't stay all that time stateside without him. Now I'm on anxiety medications and don't give flying a second thought. Flew alone to see a grandchild be born last year. It was an important event, had to be there. There are great medications available these days and counseling helps a lot too. The Army doesn't care if you want to fly or not and they will not change your husband's orders. I wish you the very best.
13. sORRY YOU CANT GET OUT OF IT! But you should accompany your spouse,it can cause problems if you dont. I flew with 2 kids under 3 from norfolk va to norita Japan all alone. NO help from anyone. They broke my stroller,and had to change planes once. They give free alcohol on the plane and have movies. So get some zanax from ol'e doc and then take a nice long nap and then have a drink,and watch a movie. It isnt that bad. You cant be going that far. Where are you going? Wish you luck.
14. i had the same fear of flying as you, but i had to get across . i opted for a non-stop flight, once your in the air your in the air.. i was nervous in the airport because i never flew before. my docgave me some pills to calm me down. i took them right before we took off. the take off was the most amazing thing i have ever lived through. also the icebergs in the water wow. i by the way fell asleep after 10minutes and woke up over great britan( icame from frankfurt ) also try to fine a night flight ship i a very bad idea imagin being stuck on a rocking thingy for 2-3weeks . if you can pick between 8-9 hours of misery or 2-3 weeks to be with your hubby its easy to choose.