Was it worth time spent away from your children and spouse to retire from the military?

My husband and I are both in the military. We are debating whether we should both stay in the military until we retire. What have been your experiences with deployments and being away from your family for long periods of time? Was retiring worth the heartache? A note to the 3rd person who answered my question. My husband and I are in the Air Force and it is totally NOT family oriented!!

Public Comments

1. You as the mother should always choose your children over money. If you can get out now, do so. In any situation, consider the children's well-being over anything else. If you wanted a career, you shouldn't have had kids. (Just my opinion.)
2. I think one of you should be home with the kids
3. we are dual military as well with children at extreme ages. my husband wants to get completely out and go back to school on my own terms (i actually don't need the military benefits for school). my husband is to retire in 3 years, myself on the other hand have a ways to go and at my age i also feel it's time to exit left stage. i have actually lost more money (nurse) by being in the service but most importantly i have absolutely no time for my children.....in a nutshell...a heartache (for us) On the other hand it depends on yor job and what branch you're in. if i could do it all over again it would have been the airforce because they are more family-oriented. obviously...i made the wrong choice. good luck with your decision.
4. I'm the spouse of a military man, and for us...yes, it is worth it. Let's face it, the 20 yrs are going to come no matter what. It would be nice to have a secure job and a good retirement after you have done your time. The best thing is the medical. If you retire from the military, you and your children will be covered for a long time. It is hard to find great medical in the civilian world for so cheap. You should sit down with your husband and see who could benefit the most from staying in until retirement. If it weighs on you so much, the other could get out...but you'll probably find that you will have the same dilemmas in the civilian world...only less benefits!!!
5. I have been in 12 years and I am a single parent. I have deployed a lot. Once a year since 2001 until 2006. I love it and hate it for lots of reasons. I miss birthdays, holidays and just time off with him. On the flip side I get to notice things I know I would never notice if I was around him all the time. For example, when he was four and I was deployed to Iraq he said "dentist" for the first time. I couldn't believe it and I loved it. I also shower him with cards, letters and presents. I think he enjoys when I leave cause he does get all those things. The longest I was gone was just shy of 6 months. That was tough but I do it for my country and my family. My son is 9 now and understands when I do have to leave. I just try and make it a positive experience for him. But I am a positve person and I make the most of it no matter where I am at. It isnt' easy but it has to be a choice you make. Hopefully the military will never deploy you at the same time. I happen to have an excellent support system. My son stays with my parents if it is during the school year....Summer times he is with his father. Good luck, I hope you it all works out for you.